Bulging eyes usually reserved for those in mental health facilities are clearly visible through your visor as you wipe off would be hangers-on by shooting nearly invisible gaps in traffic maneuvers that lay waste to Issac Newton’s best work. Come up on traffic at closing speeds so shocking, that other racers surrender en mass, fingers probing the air in a point-by motion that really says ‘be gentle’. That’s right, WFO is a lifestyle and this car is your ticket to the executive washroom.
#HAPPY METROGNOME DRIVERS#
Just the crackle of your exhaust sends Fox bodied fools back to the Broke Dick corral for more pulleys and flows while BMW E3x drivers who dare entertain the concept to keeping up are left slack jawed as you rip turn one of T-Hill with nary a lift, the Gnome’s air hungry ITB’s held agape by their demanding master’s right foot as the tires become one with the pave’. Popping mad downshifts you sail past the velvet ropes that demarcate the braking zones reserved for LeMons royalty. The sun drops low as it presides over a perfect race wherein your cut-like-a-diamond sequential dog box is busting 12 grand upshifts as your highly tuned, aero equipped, race car slices through a pack of lesser competitors. The Gnome denies all but it’s master it’s essence and here is your chance to become that person and move forward with a plan for total DOMINATION of this the sport of kings. “What’s it like to pilot one of the most effective machines in the History on LeMons? A car so magnificent that some of the greatest LeMons minds have sought to capture it’s essence in their imitations. The builders/owners/four-time race winners of the Honda CBR-powered Geo Metro known as the “Geo Metro Gnome” have listed it for sale on the 24 Hours of LeMons Forums. Naturally, there must be no better way to ring in 2014 than with the purchase of one of the most incredible crapcans ever built.
Happy New Year, Hoons! By now, most regular readers have shaken off the hangover from the bizarre Hooniversal Car of the Year results and are ready to move on to a fresh calendar ( possibly the Hooniverse calendar).
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